Confusing Signals

Speaking up for yourself as an adult is important. That is the reason we as parent’s should teach our children to speak up for themselves amount their peers as well. As we are teaching our children to be stronger individual, let us remember that their strong personality will not only be seen anount their peers, but towards us also.

If we say to our child to say “no” to something that is not right, then of course when we ask them to do something they view as wrong, they will say “no”, right? For example my son(Roell) has a cousin that is the same age as himself, who does not like to share at all. But when it comes to toy’s that belong to Roell, that same cousin feels all the toy’s belong to him, even if they are not his. I explain to Roell, that he should still share even if his cousin doesn’t. But it gets complicated when his cousin doesn’t even want Roell playing with his own toys. Of course my son gets upset, but I tell him just ‘let it be’. That is when Roell gets upset. He explains to me at home I say to ‘stand up for yourself and don’t let anyone take advantage of you’. But here I am contradicting what I said, and am now asking Roell to step down his rights for standing up for himself, just to make someone else happy.

As parent’s we all find it confusing sometimes why our children don’t listen. And at times we have every right to be upset. Even so, in certain situation it is not our child’s behavior that is frustrating, but our own as parent’s. Teaching children one thing at home, then changing what we said outside, is not only upsetting, but also it confuses them. To a point where they do not understand what direction is right or wrong at their young age.

Parenthood is not easy, but do not point the finger at your child, first reflect on “your” teaching.

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