Teaching Kids Respect

From the moment my kids were able to understand, I have been teaching them to always say “please” and “thank you”. Show respect, and be polite to others, most especially your elders. All my lecture and I feel like it has been for nothing. Maybe if you met my 7 year old you would say he is polite. But it seems at home he shows little to no manners. Why?

Are you a mean mom if your child asks you for something and you do not give it to them because they did not say “please”? If you said yes, then I guess I am a mean mom. I remembered when I was about 8 years old, my grandma asked me for a glass of water. I didn’t give it to her, because she didn’t say the “magic word, PLEASE”. Wow, I am extra ordinary. I can not say I inherited from my parents, I guess I self though myself. In the world we live in, I really do feel that if we were more polite to each other then the world would be a better place, just as the song goes by Michael Jackson. Which goes the same for our children. I used to take the subway during rush hour when I was working downtown. Oh boy, I will never forget those days. It seems like every day there was some kind of altercation between passengers. Always because we did not have the courtesy of using kind words for what we needed to say. I understand that we may have had a hard time this morning getting the kids to daycare or school or something else that did not have to do with kids. Or yes maybe after a long stressful day at work the last thing you need is having to wait on the next train, because people didn’t want to move back so you could fit in the train.

My conclusion is this, no matter how much we try to teach our children manners, when we are out with them they see how we as adults interact with each other. If they do not see us as adults respecting each other, then why should they care about respecting other. Teaching my son to respect other has always been on the top of my list. But as I am starting to review my days, I am slowly starting to understand my 7 year old confusing behavior. Or maybe I should say my confusing behavior. The way I interact with our family member, with individual over the phone. I start to understand that what I am teaching him, and what he is seeing is very contradicting. So at the end of the day, I may be ‘telling’ my son to be kind and respectful. But my ‘action’ are showing him something different. So how do you teach respect if you do not show respect ?

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